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Wednesday, March 14th, 2007
7:55 pm - LiveJournal Resurrection
Yes, I admit that I have become a MS addict like everyone else; haven't updated here since the start of Winter. Here it is approaching Springtime again. Been having an ok year so far, my resolution has actually been in effect so far this year. Had to buy a new machine after the motherboard literally burned out on my old one (luckily was able to save everything, have it all on a Mybook now). Have been buying way too much musick lately, seems as if when the season's are in transition I need more aural saturation. Missed Jesu in Charlotte on 3/9 because they couldn't get their visas in time, but they may swing back around for a headlining tour later in the year (I need another live show experience soon). Sent off the Terraform EP to 'Wounds of the Earth' webzine for review; hopefully will get some decent feedback. Having a lot of lone nights lately; sometimes good and sometimes less so. Just received part of Miss M's b-day presents via UPS. Bought an early b-day present for myself; I found the Suspiria 3-disc 25th anniversary edition with the Goblin CD for $25 (wicked). Will be 27 two weeks from today. I don't want to get any older.

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Thursday, December 21st, 2006
5:59 pm - Happy Winter Solstice

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Friday, December 8th, 2006
7:07 pm
So I finally sold my soul to MySpace.

I however still hope to update this page for 'personal' content.

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Friday, December 1st, 2006
6:06 pm - The Sounds of Autumn Falling
Nature and Organization – Beauty Reaps the Blood of Solitude
Low – Things We Lost in the Fire
Satyricon – The Shadowthrone
The Fountain - Soundtrack
Immortal – At the Heart of Winter
Dead Can Dance – Within the Realm of a Dying Sun
Reformed Faction – Vota
Explosions in the Sky - Those Who Tell the Truth Shall Die/Live Forever
Steve Roach – The Magnificent Void
Coil - The Ape of Naples

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Friday, November 24th, 2006
12:21 am - Thankful for True Cinema
I finally was fortunate enough to see Aronofsky's The Fountain today. So very long in the making, but worth every second. A story of love, death, suffering, loss and hope told over a 1,000 year span. More of an 'experience' than a film for sure, the emotions and images burned into this film are not fleeting.

Hugh Jackman is quickly becoming one of my favorite actors after this performance and in The Prestige also (definitely reaching out beyond his 'comic-book flick' mode).

Other films I'm anticipating:

Guillermo del Toro's Pan's Labyrinth
Herzog's Rescue Dawn - Starring Christian Bale
I, Lucifer - Daniel Craig as Lucifer? Hell yes!
David Lynch's Inland Empire - Can't wait to see the followup to his best film Mulholland Dr.
Zhang Yimou's Curse of the Golden Flower

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Saturday, November 18th, 2006
12:32 am
I think I'm so interested in childhood because when I was a child was the last time I was ever happy. As we get older and we become more and more unhappy, and as we see more and more the terrible state of the world and the terrible things it does to us, and that we also do back to it, that childhood becomes more and more perfect. In itself it isn't so, but the experience of it... the Japanese have this phrase, 'Mono No Aware', and the Tibetans say, 'khor.ba'i.nyes.dmigs', which means 'the Sadness of Things', that this life is not as it should be and we know that's the case and so we desperately try and find a time when the world was as we pictured it as a child, full of marvels, mysteries, full of wonder, full of joy and immanence. I think that one of the most important things about humans and humanity, there, is that we carry within us a belief in redemption, that we can redeem ourselves somehow, and I think, harking back to the innocence of childhood, there's one way that we start to do that. For myself, when I think back to a girlfriend that I used to go out with, in 1980 or whatever, now I think about her with incredible longing and love and think how perfect it was. But of course the reality wasn't like that at all, which is why we split up. So we paint the past in a way that appeals to our sense of recovering the paradise that we've lost.

--David Tibet, 1997

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Friday, November 10th, 2006
11:16 pm
I happen to believe that there is infinite mileage to be obtained from a limited resource. Take a look at the sky sometime. How do you describe what you see? It is never the same experience twice. It's a constant, prominent and permanent part of every ones experience. Yet when we look at it, do we all experience the same thoughts and feelings?

Over reliance on the detached and distant excesses of technology creates stagnant and purposeless music.

--Mark Spybey

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9:27 pm
Battling against the mundane with all my might. Feeling drained from the everyday but plodding on with what will I have. Attempting to return to my inner light. The outside world can't take it away from me. I won't let it happen.

Drifting into my aetherworlds...

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Wednesday, November 8th, 2006
10:11 pm

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Tuesday, November 7th, 2006
10:24 pm

New track up at Soundclick: Staircase Leading Nowhere

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Saturday, October 28th, 2006
7:00 pm
Wow, my local college radio station is doing a so-called "Industrial-Assault" show and they're actually playing Coil, Lustmord & NON. I'm impressed.

Getting my costume together to go to Art Bar tonight. Should be good.

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Friday, October 27th, 2006
7:46 pm


M. Gira, 1984

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7:30 pm - Upgrade
So I finally joined the 21st century and got high-speed internet. Everyone tells me I should set up a Myspace page for my music (we'll see). Just did a 30-min workout; trying to somewhat get "back on the wagon" so to speak. Pouring rain outside, looks like we're staying in tonight and taking it easy.

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Saturday, October 21st, 2006
1:07 am - Algernon Blackwood
Wow, just discovered this author's work. Very powerful horror writing still potent even after one hundred years! (I believe he is the true missing link between Poe and Lovecraft; I also see some echoes of him in Ligotti's writing). He expertly melds the terrible with a bizarre sense of the beautiful.

Some passages which stand out to me:

Yet what I felt of dread was no ordinary ghostly fear. It was infinitely greater, stranger, and seemed to arise from some dim ancestral sense of terror more profoundly disturbing than anything I had known or dreamed of. We had "strayed", as the Swede put it, into some region or some set of conditions where the risks were great, yet unintelligible to us; where the frontiers of some unknown world lay close about us. It was a spot held by the dwellers in some outer space, a sort of peep-hole whence they could spy upon the earth, themselves unseen, a point where the veil between had worn a little thin.

--The Willows

Behind the screen of memory and emotion with which experience veils events, he plunged, distracted and half-deranged, picking up false lights like a ship at sea, terror in his eyes and heart and soul. For the Panic of the Wilderness had called to him in that far voice—the Power of untamed Distance—the Enticement of the Desolation that Destroys. He knew in that moment all the pains of someone hopelessly and irretrievably lost, suffering the lust and travail of a soul in the final Loneliness.

--The Wendigo

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Monday, October 16th, 2006
6:47 pm
Took my brother and gf to Charlotte Friday night for the KMFDM show (my little brother's 1st concert, woo!). We sat in the back center of the venue while the gf just had to be front and center. First two bands blew as was expected, KMFDM churned out an impressive set as usual. Seemed like my brother really enjoyed himself. Talked with Steve White after the show, great guy. He gave me his email address and insisted that I send him some of my music, as he is tired of the "same old distorted guitar demos."

Autumn is finally here (as in I can feel it's Autumn). Fighting the urge to turn the heat on. As I'm fighting a cold, maybe I should just go turn it on.

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Sunday, October 8th, 2006
5:28 pm - Oktoberfest
Took a trip out to Augusta GA with the family and gf yesterday for Oktoberfest. As it was located on the Fort Gordon military base, it wasn’t all that easy to find. At one point we took a wrong turn down a narrow road where there was a blockade with two armed guards. Right before we backed out to turn around the guard on the left came forward and aimed his gun right at us; always a nice feeling.

Once we arrived I could hear traditional German songs playing in the distance (can’t help but visualize hundreds of Nazis marching in line to most of this stuff). Went straight for the food tent and ordered a Snitzel and a pitcher of Warsteiner (mmm, mmm...) Browsed around the flea market parallel to the event for awhile. My brother got a shirt with the german eagle emblem and "Deutschland" written on the front. GF got a decanter with some real silver on it for $10. Totally passed out on the ride back (glad I didn't have to drive). GF got a sudden fever and had to nurse her for awhile.

Raining on and off today. Getting really pissed at my lame-ass internet situation. Hopefully will get the ball rolling this coming Friday.

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Sunday, October 1st, 2006
1:35 pm - The Good Old Days of Electronic Music
Klaus Schulze


Tangerine Dream

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2:38 am
Pissing around online and drinking bullwhips like there's no tomorrow (...is there?!?). Gf is watching Gladiatior in the living room. I'm left here to dwell. Watching time pass by like a phantom. Foreign Body seems to be DOA. Where is the wonder?

Allone once again

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Saturday, September 30th, 2006
10:49 pm - Of disappointment and despair

Kind of in a dark spot right now. Everything is intangible, unreachable, feeble and futile. No road on which to travel. Static fixation. Digging holes in which to lie. Acceleration and stagnation.
Defeat without battle. Sorrow without tears.

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10:31 pm

(((Destroy all Dreamers with Debt and Depression)))

--A Silver Mt. Zion

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